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1. Introduction

Posted on: January 18th, 2008 by Colonel Crabtree-Smythe 1 Comment

Hello my dear fans and viewers.
Here is a condensed version of my memoirs so to speak. I will be updating them as we go along. Sage doesn’t know about them so you will always be ahead of the game as it were.sage cartoon

The first of my many acquaintances is Sage Mackorkadale a true blue company man and Spurs supporter, which is always suspect especially when one takes into consideration the fact that Sage isn’t a fan of the Jewish fraternity. Personally, as far as I’m concerned, I believe him to have tendencies that belie his marital status. You see he says he has a son called Max but I think he picked him up in Thailand.. .but that is another story… I mean to get to the point, Sage (the dear man that he is) well… he is very suggestive in his movements and he walks like Larry Grayson squeezing a lemon between his lower cheeks. He thinks he is a mans man in the Rugby sense, but I feel Sage would be more than at home with the cast of ‘Queer as Folk’. Anyhow, I know deep down he would like to be me; an open minded student of life with no fear of flesh.

Sage is the man that was chosen to interview me with regard my memoirs… you may well say or think what might be the reasoning behind this pre-emptive strike as it were. Well my dear fans, it’s for you to get you used to certain situations and characters and of course to get my side of proceedings into the public domain before Sage can manipulate and sensationalise my views-in truth. I wanted David Frost but Frostie has become very arrogant since his Knighthood and I also feel that his work has became very shabby (and some may say shoddy) since he has received his bus pass. I do feel that he suffers from mental lapses and it has been noted that he sometimes forgets to get off the bus, goes right to the end of the line as it were. He has also been found rummaging through dustbins in underground car parks looking for food and olde discarded tampons… something that only a good psychoanalyst could understand and appreciate!The Colonel's medals

Anyway, Sage apart, you will find most of the persons that figure are of an interesting nature. Not like Sage of course, with his little shorts and bow-tie. He thinks it does something for him but I beg to differ… he looks like Martin Weakbrain from the Marvel man comics… but don’t tell him that-because he will be most upset…

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One Response

  1. Crenthorpe says:

    crabbers ! You were always a cad!!!

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